Dinosaur Supernova

deuce_hexx @ 2008-08-25T18:39:00

2008-08-26T00:50:09Z

C.C.I.

2008-05-08T20:33:00Z

Well I woke up so hungover that I threw up more than twice
So I crawled across the street to buy some Clear Creek Ice
I passed a pack of hookers and of junkie thieves as well
They asked me for a buck o' five...
...I said, "You go to hell!"

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, can you save the day?

A junkie pulled a switchblade and he looked me in the eye
I said "Hey dude, we're cool man, I just want some C.C.I."
As we stared each other down, the sky she turned to black
A tumbleweed rolled by...
...as I heard a fateful crack

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, rode in to save the day

I seen that junkie's head explode, his face got blowed right in,
His hooker took one in the gut and then one in the chin
A stranger shot 'em down in cold blood, leavin' none alive
He tossed his back laughed and said,...
..."Now there's your buck o' five!"

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, here to save the day

Some hooker she began to cry, I seen the stranger punt her
I said, "Where'd you learn to shoot like that?" He answered, "Big Buck Hunter."
I offered him a beverage, either beer or something fruity
He said, "You save your money, son...
...This sherriff's still on duty."

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, saved the fucking day

   Oh, Cowboys and Indians,
    Together in one
    From Beverly to Enoch,
    No one's better with a gun
   Indians and cowboys, together at last
    When it comes to shooting hookers dead...
    ...No one's as fast

Well I made it to the liquor store, could not believe my eyes
The shelves were stocked with everything except for C.C.I.
My heart stood still, my blood ran cold, I said, "No! Not again!
"I'll have to drink that devil's piss...
..."That they call Perfect 10."

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, can you save the day?

With tears in eye I grabbed that swill and headed for the door
But had to wait in line behind a filthy fuckin' whore
I seen a case of Clear Creek wrapped up in her cockstained mitts
Then a muzzle flash! A cloud of smoke! A bullet through her tits!

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, rode in to save the day

She coughed some blood upon my boots and whispered, "Jesus, why?"
The stranger looked at her and said, "My dear, it's time to die.
"'Cause Clear Creek Ice is brewed for just the manliest of men,
"And no damn whore is gonna make him...
..."Drink no Perfect 10!"

Yippie aye oh, yippie aye ay
Crazy cowboy Indian, fucking saved the day

Bears & Lollipops

2008-04-04T17:30:17Z

Bored at work, I draw a bear shocked at another bear, the latter of which is licking a lollipop.

SQUIRRRRRRL

2008-03-06T23:09:33Z

Bored at work, I draw a squirrel in mspaint.

More old drawrings!

2008-01-30T15:23:30Z

Have I mentioned that I'm usually drunk when I draw?

More creepy spam!

2008-01-30T15:18:44Z

Male or female, in the three kingdoms, it's in and that under
erastian penalties, upon the disobeyers. Days of june. I
could not doubt my own ears, yet will you, david? He said,
then spoke to the man in the future. Even this was foreseen
by the learned dearly have liked to kick acton on the spot.
i mighty weapon, quickly cut off duryodhana's bow properly,
brahmanas possessed of insight into which are difficult
to be ascertained and thereby the snow came, and then continue
the work in the.

What does it mean??!!

- 50°C

2008-01-29T05:14:09Z

I am aware that:

a) I live in Alberta

b) more specifically, I live in Edmonton, the most northern of the provincial capitals.

c) it gets pretty cold up in here.

Therefore, I am willing to accept temperatures as low as -25. Even -30 would be tolerable for a couple of days. But two days into a week of -50, I am seriously doubting my resolve to stay here. This is complete shit.

Spam!

2008-01-28T17:00:43Z

I keep getting really weird, creepy spam on my work email account. They generally have a link at the start promising free medicine or free downloads. Then they go like this:

Out! He whispered hoarsely. She ain't dead yet. Her husband
secretly as had been asserted, surely a flea. Joe can lick
him with one hand, can't was i with shock and the burning
pain, back again hold of a real womans frock from somewhere
and for herself, married her and made of her a lady to lose
southern persia we must push the railway fragments were
holmes rubbed his hands. This is peopleancient cavedwellers,
once the neighbours tell him to bring his surgical instruments
also,.

Or this:

By his devotees) he that is the master of ell that is destitute
of qualities. These seven are concealed himself) even by
brahmanas, let alone and when the victory was gained, they
not infrequently of now? Arrayed let us stand in battle
against of yonder hill. The chilly night winds of the and
krishna, thou wilt certainly regain that energy as i myself
was begotten in the soil of my father servant, as soon as
he lay in bed, give me half learned pretty fully the chemistry
of life. We.

I keep hoping there is some secret code behind them, because secrets are cool and life is boring.

Blog?

2008-01-03T17:27:18Z

Blog!!!!

?

Sudoku robot doesn't even know where to start, poor guy.

2007-10-26T00:41:34Z

Frankenstein's Monster is a cute Frankenstein's Monster

2007-10-17T06:42:14Z

I got my kitty (Frankenstein's Monster) a present today... it's a Frankenstein's Monster costume!!! The Irony is killing me!

Goodbye Vladimir

2007-10-10T17:29:50Z

One of my rats died today. He was soft and cuddly and will be missed. My ex-girlfriend's gerbil just died a week or two ago too, so if you have a rodent make sure you tell them you love them and give them something extra to chew on.

Mean Drawrings!

2007-10-05T20:20:12Z

My Robot

2007-10-05T20:08:49Z

Mr

Damn right, it's better than yours. I can teach it, but it has to charge.

Old Biographical Comics! (from when I worked in a call center and hated it!!!) Part 1

2007-10-04T15:45:52Z

Plus: My favorite!!! (more to come) :

Old Drawrings!

2007-10-04T15:40:24Z

Next up I start uploadin' my old biographi-comics!

Robot hearts kitty!

2007-09-16T21:08:30Z

Best sandwich ever?

2007-09-15T23:46:28Z

God damn! The Cobb sandwich at Colonel Mustard's is AMAZING!!!! Turkey breast, avocado, blue cheese, bacon and mustard on sourdough. Fuck yeah. Exactly what I needed. While I was waiting for the 8 year old waitress to bring me my order I drew this:

I think I'm gonna redraw it on nice paper with nice markers.

Ghoooooooosts

2007-09-15T12:33:31Z

I don't really believe in ghosts that much, but I do see them all the time. Maybe I'm just insane. Insomnia and anxiety probably don't help. I often see figures in my peripheral vision and turn to find no one there (usually at home, maybe it'll tone down when I move, but judging by the neighbourhood, more people have probably died there). Things go missing in this house, taps turn themselves on, and kittys stare at things (though that's kinda what kittys do). My brother has a bolt lock on the inside of his room door which has been locked twice when there was no one inside (except ghosts). Plus there's this unedited picture proving Frankenstein's Monster died at some point is only pretending to still be with us:

Long story short, I'm scared of ghosts.

Yay! Drawings!

2007-09-15T06:32:55Z

As I do this thang, I will often put my stupid drawings in... I have a lot of old ones I'm pretty proud of, and a lot of old ones which were stupid and drunken enough that I think they are worth reposting. Some have stories to go with them, others don't. This is one I had an idea for today and I think is one of my best. Take that as you will.

It evolved out of this doodle, which I have resized and colored through the power of computer:

Yay!

Work is slooooo

2007-09-14T21:47:14Z

On the way to work today I stopped to pet an overweight orange and white cat. It rolled around and enjoyed it, purring its tits off. Then it farted really loudly. What the hell.

I'm still a little upset I didn't get to help CJ yell abuse at Rick Mercer the other day. Oh well. Maybe Colin Mochrie will show up some day.

I'm going to draw something tonight before I start packing. What will it be?!? A surprise!!! And by "start packing" I probably mean have a few beers and fall asleep, if the last few nights have been any indication. Oh well. I don't have to move for another week or so anyway.

Slept and slept

2007-09-12T19:28:23Z

Slept for twelve hours last night... it was weird. But at least I feel pretty non-sleepy today. Throughout my dream me and whoever I was with would periodically have to run from two races of monsters, one looked all horrible and scary like the Dog in "The Little Puppy Who Could" by Martin Amis (not the puppy, the monster dog), while the other looked cuter, like Pikmin. The cute ones were far more deadly though, as the monstrous ones didn't bite very hard and were easily distracted by whatever food I could throw behind me (there were lots of apple trees around). Also they would eat any little ones that got in their way.

Where have all the dinosaurs gone?

2007-09-11T18:27:11Z

I am frequently incredibly bored at work, so let's try this new-fangled blogging I've heard so much about.